Monday 22 November 2021

Disaster in the Writing Group

At that time - funeral woes

Disaster 

by guest blogger RL November 2021

First a disclaimer. Any similarity to events in your life is entirely coincidental and unintended. 

Death, as an inevitable part of life, is natural, it therefore follows that when siblings and close family cannot agree on funeral arrangements, then it is a natural disaster that follows. 

For several days the telephone companies rejoice as the lobby groups form and dissipate. What the deceased might have wanted is irrelevant. Blunt force may be needed to ensure that a funeral service will be held, with a priest – roughly what mother and daughter would have wanted. The service will be followed by a small intimate graveside service as the coffin is lowered into its final resting place. This simple agreement might seem like a resolution, but it is the proverbial calm before the storm.

Then it starts again – photographic tribute:- the deceased must appear at their best, if one cousin is shown then every cousin must be included, debates over the song to be played at the photo tribute.
More – should a hymn be sung, the music before and after the service. 
What about the type of flowers?  
There is total silence on who does the eulogy, someone offers, then everyone has suggestions and wants inclusions, or doesn't want that included. A nice dress is bought for the transition of the departed, wrong colour, needs to be brighter. 

The funeral director asks if we can provide 6 pallbearers, - why are pallbearers needed? Don't we pay the funeral director for that? Better get people of the same height or the coffin will be carried lopsided. No one asks about the twenty one gun salute and the way the Australian flag will be folded, or the gun carriage's route through town!, though they might be wondering.

So the event happens, the much loved departed is finally laid to rest. Warring parties seem to manage to keep a safe distance apart. There are even some signs of peace negotiations No one talks about the funeral for a few days, the phone lines are strangely muted. That is, except for the good friend who rings on the same day as the funeral.

"Was it today? We (there were 4 in the car) turned up 1pm and no one was there." 
But it was at 11am - we say, I thought you said 1pm – they say. 
Brief flurry of phone calls. One sibling thought it said 1pm on the funeral directors web site – 
“They always get things wrong. Maybe it was the Newspaper ad."
"No definitely said 11am." I say – "the 4 elderly people wouldn't have looked at a web site anyway."

Oh well, just put it down to a natural disaster.

Dynamite will be laid and cyclones will build when they find out the cost!

The Writers' Group

The Writers' Group meets on the second Wednesday of each month to share their family stories. Each month a different topic is added to the participants' repertoire with the aim of preserving these memories and stories for future generations. Each person has an entirely individual interpretation of the topic so a great deal of variety is generated. Suggestions for corrections and enhancements are discussed sometimes with much hilarity.

Some of the topics covered in 2021 were:  
Unexpected, Nearly forgotten, At work, Unforgettable, Strong woman, Tombstone and Disaster.

At the final general meeting of the year the Writers' Group provided much entertainment when many of the participants read one of their stories written this year. The funerary story above was provided by a member of the Writers' Group.

If you would like to join the Writers' Group come along to the Heritage Centre in Cooroy.

5 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. The writer read this so well, many in the audience could empathise with him.

      Delete
  2. I loved reading this. We love our families, but my goodness they can be frustrating.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh I did laugh when I read about the pallbearers being of uniform size. I remember requesting that at my mother's funeral...what we think of in our grief!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At my mother's funeral the pallbearers were grandsons but one was a grandson-in-law, there was some angst about that!!

      Delete

We welcome your comments. All comments are moderated.